dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
