words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Sorry my hands just texted you
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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