just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Randomize
