HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
