after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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