Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
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