Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
