He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
