I'm sorry my penis didn't work
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
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