Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize