doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize