she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
