And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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