i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
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I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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