I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
