How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
You dont lie about slip and slides
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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