The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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