I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
