Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize
