tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize