No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.