beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.