gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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