I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
