I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize