Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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