Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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