Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize