That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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