i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
