My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
NoShamevember. You game?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
