I just gift wrapped bread.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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