so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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