Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
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he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
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our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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