I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
