No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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