Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
