Where are you?
In a non slutty way
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize