Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
