Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize