Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard