I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
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we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
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he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.