I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
operation have a gay friend backfired
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
