I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
