My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
