Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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