That's intense
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
