I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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