He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I will be naked everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
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