your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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