In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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