OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
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You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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