so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
not ubering you a puppy
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
