I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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